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REPLY: (by Miranda) Feb 21 2011 1:14am
This is pretty long, but I feel it's a really good example of why it's important to sometimes take time to talk to and listen to 'problem' players.
I asked ChaosGypsy's permission to post this.
To start, I do want to say that I do not think muting someone under the circumstances she did is normally a good idea. It often causes more problems than it helps. In this case, it actually worked out to help everything, but I believe it only did because she took the time to chat with the player quite a bit.

Take notice of how this started. ChaosGypsy was having a lot of problems with this player and the player did not like her at all. It ended with her actually asking to be buddies. :)

C-Feb20 18:28:29 ChaosGypsy(G): No Personal Info
C-Feb20 18:28:35 ChaosGypsy(G): you know the rules
C-Feb20 18:28:44 ChaosGypsy(G): DONT push them -.-
C-Feb20 18:28:57 Player($): shut it Chaos
I-Feb20 18:29:05 Player Player Has clicked QUIT button
SER-Feb20 18:52:05pm Player Successfully Logged In.
ADM-Feb20 18:57:39 ADMIN (ChaosGypsy) COMMAND: [MUTE Player 60 ]
C-Feb20 18:59:52 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|your muted 60 min for causing drama in global and for dodging a mute next time stay out of things that do not concern you
C-Feb20 19:00:43 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|im not affraid u know
C-Feb20 19:01:11 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|i did not mute you to scare you
C-Feb20 19:01:38 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|im not scared to soeak my mind either
C-Feb20 19:01:42 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|i muted you because you dodges a mute for causing drama in global chats and for being rude in global chats
C-Feb20 19:01:56 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|but its my opinion
C-Feb20 19:01:59 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|there are rules everyone on hi has to follow
C-Feb20 19:02:28 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|yes thats fine but you cannot speak them like that you must follow the same rules as everyuone else
C-Feb20 19:02:49 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|the entire game has to follow rules
C-Feb20 19:03:03 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|yes and isnt one being nice to others? well you are not always nice to everyone.......and by the entire game taht means u too
C-Feb20 19:03:12 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|they are all written out in detail for all the players to read and to follow
C-Feb20 19:03:23 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|including you?
C-Feb20 19:03:42 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|yes it does but when i am talking to someone else that is between them and I not you and them and i
C-Feb20 19:04:07 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|well can i make a suggestion then?
C-Feb20 19:04:26 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|all you do is get yourself into trouble by getting involved
C-Feb20 19:04:37 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|but can i make asuggestion?
C-Feb20 19:04:39 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|I send out global warning
C-Feb20 19:04:42 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|and yes please do
C-Feb20 19:07:18 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|ok well i think that things such as a punishment in global shouldnt happen because then it is not private and while it does not involve evryonelse its not private either so...even though its more work...u should just om them instead and things like this wont happen...and....when mods arent on there are so many other people doing so much worse and one of the rules is not being a mini mod and yet people still do all im saying is if people want things private make them private
C-Feb20 19:08:11 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|can i ask you something?
C-Feb20 19:08:15 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|yes
C-Feb20 19:09:08 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|did you ever stop and think that maybe we have tried talking to a person several times in private and they ignored us.... so we have HAD to go into global to get their attention....
C-Feb20 19:09:21 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|sometimes because they are new and they dont know the chats
C-Feb20 19:09:41 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|how can they ignore you? you are a mod
C-Feb20 19:09:43 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|and sometimes because they just dont care....
C-Feb20 19:10:08 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|they just decide to ignore us they think its funny to make drama in global...
C-Feb20 19:10:20 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|thats why sometimes we have to mute for it....
C-Feb20 19:10:32 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|if it were up to me....
C-Feb20 19:10:37 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|yes
C-Feb20 19:10:38 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|?
C-Feb20 19:10:42 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|i wouldnt ever mute....
C-Feb20 19:10:48 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|oh
C-Feb20 19:10:58 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|its a pain i would much rather hunt about for horses *laughing out loud!*
C-Feb20 19:11:16 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|haha yeah that would be a lot better
C-Feb20 19:11:27 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|but you are right you know
C-Feb20 19:11:32 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|i am here because i love playing the game I adore HI
C-Feb20 19:11:57 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|people should follow the rules and i am sorry for casuing trouble
C-Feb20 19:12:02 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|i love to jump even if i am the games worst jumper
C-Feb20 19:12:08 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|haha
C-Feb20 19:12:14 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|i used to show horses
C-Feb20 19:12:20 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|in 4-H
C-Feb20 19:12:44 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|its ok I am gonna lift your mkute because i think now you know where i am coming from
C-Feb20 19:12:52 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|thank you
C-Feb20 19:12:53 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|i was a 4-H leader *laughing out loud!*
C-Feb20 19:13:01 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|gimme a sec
C-Feb20 19:13:05 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|oh wow thats cool
ADM-Feb20 19:14:10 ADMIN (ChaosGypsy) COMMAND: [UNMUTE Player ]
C-Feb20 19:14:22 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|thank you
C-Feb20 19:14:24 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|there you go =)
C-Feb20 19:14:29 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|you're welcome
C-Feb20 19:14:29 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|thank you so much
C-Feb20 19:14:44 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|so can you tell me a littl emore about mods?
C-Feb20 19:14:54 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|stay out of trouble and when i go into global... there is usually a reason for it ;)
C-Feb20 19:15:07 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|haha ok
C-Feb20 19:15:37 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|we are just like you we play because we love it and because we want it safe for everyone.. and well we just got picked =)
C-Feb20 19:15:56 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|and i will try to sound more friendly ok ;)
C-Feb20 19:16:24 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|thats sounds great!
C-Feb20 19:16:35 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|i really am sorry!
C-Feb20 19:16:43 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|so am i =)
C-Feb20 19:16:54 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|i just....mods seem different.....
C-Feb20 19:17:13 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|like when you are not talking to them like we are
C-Feb20 19:17:23 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|were not really *laughing out loud!* just horse crazed players like everyone else
C-Feb20 19:17:26 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|hehehe
C-Feb20 19:17:39 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|haha cool so how did you get picked??
C-Feb20 19:17:52 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|they just asked me one day =)
C-Feb20 19:18:17 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|wow you probably have to not have any Violations huh?
C-Feb20 19:18:30 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|yep had my share *laughing out loud!*
C-Feb20 19:18:41 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|oh really?? *laughing out loud!*
C-Feb20 19:19:22 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|yep i am a regular player just like everyone else other then trying to make sure the games safe for everyone =)
C-Feb20 19:19:42 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|yeah...do you get violations when your a md?
C-Feb20 19:19:45 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|mod*
C-Feb20 19:19:54 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|yep
C-Feb20 19:20:00 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|wow
C-Feb20 19:20:26 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|i think you are really amazing Chaos
C-Feb20 19:21:21 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|thanks =)
C-Feb20 19:21:25 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|i really love your profile too!
C-Feb20 19:21:38 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|especially the last parts :)
C-Feb20 19:21:42 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|lkol its pretty plain *laughing out loud!*
C-Feb20 19:21:51 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|but its funny!
C-Feb20 19:21:59 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|thanks
C-Feb20 19:22:04 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|sure
C-Feb20 19:24:02 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|oh one more question?
C-Feb20 19:24:05 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|sorry
C-Feb20 19:24:07 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|sure
C-Feb20 19:24:18 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|do u memorize all the rules?
C-Feb20 19:24:48 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|*laughing out loud!* i tried to but I keep them up in a window at all times when i am on =)
C-Feb20 19:25:51 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|cool....oh and...sorry.....do people who like to ........um.....butter you up..there we go....do they annoy you??
C-Feb20 19:26:19 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|nah i try to not get annoyed *laughing out loud!* its bad for ya *laughing out loud!*
C-Feb20 19:27:09 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|haha thanks you are so much different than i thought you would be
C-Feb20 19:27:24 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|thanks =)
C-Feb20 19:27:34 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|how many buddies do you have?
C-Feb20 19:28:22 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|oh not too many I dont add as i am not on alot right now *laughing out loud!*
C-Feb20 19:28:59 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|oh cool ...i feel kinda weird asking I don't know why though do u wanna be my bud?
C-Feb20 19:29:21 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|when i come back full time sure =)
C-Feb20 19:29:30 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|will be about 2-3 weeks *laughing out loud!*
C-Feb20 19:29:40 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|i am still unpacking and stuff *laughing out loud!*
C-Feb20 19:29:41 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|why arent you on full time?
C-Feb20 19:29:45 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|oh you moved!
C-Feb20 19:29:48 ChaosGypsy(P): Player|just moved *laughing out loud!*
C-Feb20 19:29:50 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|i see!
C-Feb20 19:29:53 Player(P): ChaosGypsy|haha!
REPLY: (by Elanor) Feb 21 2011 7:40am
Wow that is soo encouraging and can I say well done Chaos. It just shows that even though they can be trouble to begin with underneath they can be so nice, its just taking the time to talk to them I guess. Amazing Im so glad you shared this Miranda, thank you.
REPLY: (by DesertPaint) Feb 21 2011 8:01am
!!- Way To Go -!! Romi! :)

REPLY: (by RockPile) Feb 21 2011 9:02am
Nicely done. I think a lot of players simply want to chat with someone when they're upset about... anything, really. Maybe at that moment, their life is in chaos (no pun intended) and need someone to just listen. I've drawn players into PM chat before, when they say something inflammatory in global, because they just need someone to listen. And I'm usually pretty good at listening. = )

I also think players appreciate when mods... Pull back the curtain, so to speak. Let them understand what mods do, and how we think. I think we (mods) *all* want HI to be a safe, fun experience for *everyone* and players don't always see that bigger picture.

Again, well done. And thanks Miranda and Chaos for sharing = )
REPLY: (by Naginata) Feb 21 2011 9:14am
Great job, Chaos! =)
REPLY: (by OrbWeaver) Feb 21 2011 10:29am
Well done, Romi!
REPLY: (by ChaosGypsy) Feb 21 2011 3:01pm
thanks Guys... I just figure the kids today that are on the net pretty much 24/7 or everyday after school and after dinner and such ate what a decade ago were called the Latch key kids... they are now the "keyboard Kids"... they just need to know someones out there and that they are safe... and HI needs to be that "safe place" and we are those people that are out there for them when they are stuck at home waiting for parents to get off work and putting up with older siblings that are *babysitting* *laughing out loud!* 99% of the time I find this is the major issue *laughing out loud!* so I rain them in and listen and let them know hey someones out there and we care even if its caring enough to say NO yo cannot do that you too have to behave... sometimes that means even more... I knwo to my own herd of kids that meant even more to them growing up *laughing out loud!* that I took the time to tell then WHOA there is no way thats gonna fly in my house... these kids are not that different from my own *laughing out loud!* just a bit further away but just as dear to me and yes they do at times make my hair go just a grey *laughing out loud!*
REPLY: (by FrogLips) Feb 21 2011 7:32pm
Very nice Chaos.. and I totally relate and agree with the keyboard kids.. I've noticed sometimes they don't have parents at home to remind them that their life/actions are important and that our caring even just over the net means the world to them. Adding grey hairs here with a few online kids at a time...
Thank you so much Miranda for sharing also
REPLY: (by JerseyHotblood) Feb 21 2011 10:08pm
Very NICE Chaos. I'm a ingurgitateer for a happy Ending :)
I think we all do a Great job. Horse Ise is a VERY safe site. And I would like to Thank ALL the mods who are a part of making that happen :)

We can all comb our grey hair together....But While we do....We will know our Players are SAFE!!!!!

Hats off to ALL <3

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